à la carte spirit by ilona fried
Family
For My Father’s 90th, Musings on Love and Loss
My father would have turned 90 on June 15. A few months after he died in 2003, I discovered this photograph of him from 1949 or 1950. He’s 19 or 20, posing in a beret, wool coat and tailored pants. His shoes gleam. His wide stance suggests confidence. His sly grin hints that he’d just … Continue reading
In a Crisis, Old Memories Cycle into the Present
Yesterday I cycled into Northampton for the first farmer’s market of the season. The ride is about 30 minutes, mostly flat or downhill. It was my road biking debut, rather than using a bike path (to which I drive). At the market I stood in a socially distanced line for half an hour before I … Continue reading
My Toilet Paper Quest Unraveled an Ancient Memory
Ever since I walked El Camino de Santiago, I have had an aversion to buying products in bulk. Stocking up, stockpiling, or hoarding doesn’t make me feel safe or secure. Rather, that behavior makes me feel stifled, crowded and weighed down, as if fear or scarcity is occupying too much space in my nervous system. … Continue reading
It’s Possible to Drown Out Marching Nazis. What About the Ones in Our Heads?
That 40,000 people marched peacefully in Boston on Saturday against hate groups, including Nazis, gave me hope that civilization would survive, at least for the weekend. While it’s important to starkly delineate what is, and what is not, acceptable in a modern democratic nation, it would be a foolish mistake to believe that everyone on … Continue reading
Why It’s OK, Even Imperative, to Laugh at the Tiki Torch Troglodytes
My late father, a survivor of Auschwitz, periodically told variations of the following joke when I was a kid: “Did you know that Jews and bicyclists caused World War II?” “Why the bicyclists?” I naively asked the first time. “Why the Jews?” After delivering the punchline, my dad chuckled. I either rolled my eyes, groaned … Continue reading
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